1-04-24
I AM OFFICIALLY IN REMISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wahoo!
We just find out Wednesday but there is so much more to it that we didn't want to announce it yet. We needed to absorb the information.
So okay, here goes my lame attempt at an explanation of what's to come:
____________________________________________________________
*I am remaining on Chemo. This could be only a few more months and then they taper off. They want to get me into a "deep remission."
*This is big:
They want me to go for a stem cell transplant late spring/early summer.
Why?
1. Don't bother looking this up. The published research is about 3-5 years behind the actual data. The latest clinical trial data on myeloma is great news "average overall survival went from 3-5 years to 8-10 years.
2. The opinion of 3 Doctors is that I am unique in "Their" experience and off the charts in reaction, and health after 8 months of chemo and radiation. Therefore, they believe that my overall survival is going to be on the other end of their data, upwards of twenty years.
But, no guarantees.
3. *Stem cell process and dates, more or less:
In late early March I go in for the "Harvesting" process:
*Heart echo
*Liver and kidney check
*Bone marrow biopsy
*Therapist visit (mandatory)
*Daily injection of a drug they increases stem cell growth but also frees it up into the blood stream for later collection
*Harvest like dialysis it removes your blood collect the stem cells (thru remove enough for two transplants and freeze the other half for a later stem transplant in ten years) and puts your blood back into you.
*I finish my seminars and go back in early June for the transplant.
*New information: is no longer 4-6 weeks in lockdown for myeloma. ITS ONLY TWO WEEKS.
And they let you walk around!
* Then I'm back home for 1-3 months for recovery.
* Fatal reaction has gone down to fractions of 1%. With me they think it will be even more negligible.
*Good news is that they believe I will be cancer free and symptom free for most of that time 8-10 years.
*Ins will cover it, the next one in ten years? Medicare will cover.
*With the rapid changes in DNA and immune therapist who knows what will become available in that time.
________________________
My opinions as the non medical professional.
1. They have NEVER been right about my response to chemo. They don’t have any knowledge of fasting/chemo and cancer even though it’s won Nobel prizes, has over 430 papers and trials and Is recommended by the American Cancer Society, the National Institute of Health and many other countries. Personally, I think that is one mother load of a rebuke against big Pharma and its influence on modern medicine, They don’t know about chi-gongs, so they have no way to understand its effects. They were not correct, not even one time. I could have worked this year. I was never immune compromised! In fact, when they switched me to the more toxic chemo? My red blood cell count...went up!! The Doc said to Zoë "Did you see this? It went up 5 points higher in the normal range." Then he turned to me and exasperatingly waived the paper and said with a grin "I don't understand you at all."
So when they tell me I'm going to be immune compromised and wiped out after the stem cell transplant for up tp three months?
Sorry, I just don't believe it.
That said, I can't plan seminars away from the house till Sept
They will draw blood regularly and monitor; if I am as healthy in reaction as I think I will be? I will do a seminar at the house.
So right now I have a busy spring, and I anticipate a busy fall/winter seminar schedule....cancer free.
I will spend the summer forging and finishing sword and knife commissions, staining the house and other things.
________________________
From me
In this, the hardest year of my life, I can't possibly thank everyone enough:
From the financial help (go fund me was a fraction of the actual help)
To the many prayers from individuals to entire churches, the positive thoughts of my Atheists friends (I’m still giving the Glory to God, People! Though studies have proved the effectiveness of positive thoughts aimed.)
To the many encouraging letters and phone calls on and on.
However, the biggest thank you goes to my students; I have learned to let my guard down and open up. From never asking for help - Yet myself being in charge of several outreach ministries; rebuilding an orphanage in Haiti, to organizing a 12 church 40,000lb a month food distribution, to 50% funding
and organizing a city center outreach for drug and food center, to working with illegal immigrants for 25 years....I have now learned how to receive.
It’s been humbling and life changing. Zoë says I’m a changed man. I offered in my previous post of why I didn't trust; from business, to teaching internationally (I still have four students that screwed me over) to recognizing and focusing on the thousands who have trained with me and been delightful people, to the hundreds that have been loyal, sweet, kind and offered their friendship.
So, here's to everyone!!
Every, single one.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I'm pledging to trying to live what you taught me. To remain open!
Here's to the comeback tour of 24'
Seminars till June, then summer off-then seminars in fall/winter.
That may change as I prove to be healthier than they plan on.
Cheers
Dan
____________________________________________________________
12-2-23
Unqualified and under-qualified Students
Please stop asking me about the unqualified and highly questionable men out there on video and messaging and calling you trying to show things they supposedly learned from me. Worse, the one using my contact list to offer to come show you their "skills" and share. I know them. They have nothing to offer but a poorly understood mishmash of their ideas and poor results. Oddly, they are unaware they many of you are better than them. As an Aussie put it so clearly: "You have nothing to show me, which means you want to learn -from me. "Why aren't you training with, Dan?"
They obviously have no clue just how bad they are and how inept they look.
Two things I've always found consistent in martial arts:
1. Low level people, once they encounter something good, don't take the time to learn it well and just.... can't...wait...to share their ignorance with the world! Worse are the ones dumb enough to think they added their own "insights and improvements" to something they were never good at in the first place! All they have clearly demonstrated is an unchecked ego.
In systems with ranks, It's the equivalent of a 2nd kyu just....dying to teach. A comical state of affairs.
2. Their lame reasoning? They actually said this:
"I know I suck, but I'm better then them so I want to share!"
To which I say, "Share what? Your obvious lack of skill and misunderstanding of the material? External movement in the name of internals?" You....yes...you... are the reason it will gain a bad reputation. You don't have what it takes! And can't support your own argument for it. And down the drain we go!"
________________________
As I age I've come to understand why the Asians don't want to teach high level material to westerners. We really are morons. Give us time...we'll prove it to you...every...single....time.
Want to ruin high level skills? Give it to westerners who just, can't, wait to teach what little they know.
Ego abounds:
*Stiff people convinced they found a better way to soften, then you pop them with a finger...😄
*Chi warriors who obviously use misdirected lines of force as response with little to no chi involved
*Men who teach "ground path" forces, who have no f'ing clue how badly that low-level understanding will fail in active grappling based mma stresses with three or four "lines of force" changes a second.
*Men claiming a deep Chinese understanding then confusing tendon meridians with energy meridians for power.
____________________________
The Book
I keep getting asked, "When is your book coming out?"
More and more I keep asking myself: "To what purpose?"
For these men? For morally questionable men like this to be even more well armed?
Your silence and tolerance of the antics of these unqualified men willing to steal my work, all but convinced me to just walk away from it and join the Asian teachers and just let it die. It's better than giving it over to people like them.
So when you ask me, just picture this. You have met me, felt the power I can deliver, heard the stories of how I developed it, the exercises that I developed that are mine. You know how I feel; the softness and power I convey in free movement.... then me having to listen to or watch their comedic antics as they steal my work and think they are any sort of representation....of me, when we all know how inept they really are.
Just imagine;
Them, in a room, with me?
____________________________________________________________
Cancer
Worse yet, has anyone noticed they all decided to do this in the year I have cancer. What does that tell you about their character? I don't even imagine they realize the optics of that.
"Hey, Dan has cancer. Let's take his stuff we barely understand and teach it. I don't think they are even capable of perceiving how it looks.
Why?
I think they lack the moral clarity, the integrity needed to be self aware enough to get that. Which is obvious; both in their sharing of any of MY material without permission and their lack of knowledge and ability.
I appreciate everyone giving me a heads up. But it might be better to tell them directly what you think of both them and their efforts. For me? Stress feeds cancer, they obviously, by deed, intent and action, wish me the worst. I can't give them the time.
As an Asian teacher once said when asked why he doesn't debate on forums? "Why argue...with students?"
As times goes by, more and more the wisdom of the Asian model keeps showing itself. I have to fight not to give in and close up shop.
Zoë words:
She continues to remind me: "Look at all the wonderful people we have met all over world and have to our home. Look in "their" eyes. They are quality people filled with integrity. You have built friendships and an international group. Don't let yourself get weighed down by these wanna-be's. They do not have your interest at heart. They are ego driven and into themselves.
Walk away from them. Focus on all the good. It is these people who are proving a case to NOT teach.
These men are proof.
I AM OFFICIALLY IN REMISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wahoo!
We just find out Wednesday but there is so much more to it that we didn't want to announce it yet. We needed to absorb the information.
So okay, here goes my lame attempt at an explanation of what's to come:
____________________________________________________________
*I am remaining on Chemo. This could be only a few more months and then they taper off. They want to get me into a "deep remission."
*This is big:
They want me to go for a stem cell transplant late spring/early summer.
Why?
1. Don't bother looking this up. The published research is about 3-5 years behind the actual data. The latest clinical trial data on myeloma is great news "average overall survival went from 3-5 years to 8-10 years.
2. The opinion of 3 Doctors is that I am unique in "Their" experience and off the charts in reaction, and health after 8 months of chemo and radiation. Therefore, they believe that my overall survival is going to be on the other end of their data, upwards of twenty years.
But, no guarantees.
3. *Stem cell process and dates, more or less:
In late early March I go in for the "Harvesting" process:
*Heart echo
*Liver and kidney check
*Bone marrow biopsy
*Therapist visit (mandatory)
*Daily injection of a drug they increases stem cell growth but also frees it up into the blood stream for later collection
*Harvest like dialysis it removes your blood collect the stem cells (thru remove enough for two transplants and freeze the other half for a later stem transplant in ten years) and puts your blood back into you.
*I finish my seminars and go back in early June for the transplant.
*New information: is no longer 4-6 weeks in lockdown for myeloma. ITS ONLY TWO WEEKS.
And they let you walk around!
* Then I'm back home for 1-3 months for recovery.
* Fatal reaction has gone down to fractions of 1%. With me they think it will be even more negligible.
*Good news is that they believe I will be cancer free and symptom free for most of that time 8-10 years.
*Ins will cover it, the next one in ten years? Medicare will cover.
*With the rapid changes in DNA and immune therapist who knows what will become available in that time.
________________________
My opinions as the non medical professional.
1. They have NEVER been right about my response to chemo. They don’t have any knowledge of fasting/chemo and cancer even though it’s won Nobel prizes, has over 430 papers and trials and Is recommended by the American Cancer Society, the National Institute of Health and many other countries. Personally, I think that is one mother load of a rebuke against big Pharma and its influence on modern medicine, They don’t know about chi-gongs, so they have no way to understand its effects. They were not correct, not even one time. I could have worked this year. I was never immune compromised! In fact, when they switched me to the more toxic chemo? My red blood cell count...went up!! The Doc said to Zoë "Did you see this? It went up 5 points higher in the normal range." Then he turned to me and exasperatingly waived the paper and said with a grin "I don't understand you at all."
So when they tell me I'm going to be immune compromised and wiped out after the stem cell transplant for up tp three months?
Sorry, I just don't believe it.
That said, I can't plan seminars away from the house till Sept
They will draw blood regularly and monitor; if I am as healthy in reaction as I think I will be? I will do a seminar at the house.
So right now I have a busy spring, and I anticipate a busy fall/winter seminar schedule....cancer free.
I will spend the summer forging and finishing sword and knife commissions, staining the house and other things.
________________________
From me
In this, the hardest year of my life, I can't possibly thank everyone enough:
From the financial help (go fund me was a fraction of the actual help)
To the many prayers from individuals to entire churches, the positive thoughts of my Atheists friends (I’m still giving the Glory to God, People! Though studies have proved the effectiveness of positive thoughts aimed.)
To the many encouraging letters and phone calls on and on.
However, the biggest thank you goes to my students; I have learned to let my guard down and open up. From never asking for help - Yet myself being in charge of several outreach ministries; rebuilding an orphanage in Haiti, to organizing a 12 church 40,000lb a month food distribution, to 50% funding
and organizing a city center outreach for drug and food center, to working with illegal immigrants for 25 years....I have now learned how to receive.
It’s been humbling and life changing. Zoë says I’m a changed man. I offered in my previous post of why I didn't trust; from business, to teaching internationally (I still have four students that screwed me over) to recognizing and focusing on the thousands who have trained with me and been delightful people, to the hundreds that have been loyal, sweet, kind and offered their friendship.
So, here's to everyone!!
Every, single one.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I'm pledging to trying to live what you taught me. To remain open!
Here's to the comeback tour of 24'
Seminars till June, then summer off-then seminars in fall/winter.
That may change as I prove to be healthier than they plan on.
Cheers
Dan
____________________________________________________________
12-2-23
Unqualified and under-qualified Students
Please stop asking me about the unqualified and highly questionable men out there on video and messaging and calling you trying to show things they supposedly learned from me. Worse, the one using my contact list to offer to come show you their "skills" and share. I know them. They have nothing to offer but a poorly understood mishmash of their ideas and poor results. Oddly, they are unaware they many of you are better than them. As an Aussie put it so clearly: "You have nothing to show me, which means you want to learn -from me. "Why aren't you training with, Dan?"
They obviously have no clue just how bad they are and how inept they look.
Two things I've always found consistent in martial arts:
1. Low level people, once they encounter something good, don't take the time to learn it well and just.... can't...wait...to share their ignorance with the world! Worse are the ones dumb enough to think they added their own "insights and improvements" to something they were never good at in the first place! All they have clearly demonstrated is an unchecked ego.
In systems with ranks, It's the equivalent of a 2nd kyu just....dying to teach. A comical state of affairs.
2. Their lame reasoning? They actually said this:
"I know I suck, but I'm better then them so I want to share!"
To which I say, "Share what? Your obvious lack of skill and misunderstanding of the material? External movement in the name of internals?" You....yes...you... are the reason it will gain a bad reputation. You don't have what it takes! And can't support your own argument for it. And down the drain we go!"
________________________
As I age I've come to understand why the Asians don't want to teach high level material to westerners. We really are morons. Give us time...we'll prove it to you...every...single....time.
Want to ruin high level skills? Give it to westerners who just, can't, wait to teach what little they know.
Ego abounds:
*Stiff people convinced they found a better way to soften, then you pop them with a finger...😄
*Chi warriors who obviously use misdirected lines of force as response with little to no chi involved
*Men who teach "ground path" forces, who have no f'ing clue how badly that low-level understanding will fail in active grappling based mma stresses with three or four "lines of force" changes a second.
*Men claiming a deep Chinese understanding then confusing tendon meridians with energy meridians for power.
____________________________
The Book
I keep getting asked, "When is your book coming out?"
More and more I keep asking myself: "To what purpose?"
For these men? For morally questionable men like this to be even more well armed?
Your silence and tolerance of the antics of these unqualified men willing to steal my work, all but convinced me to just walk away from it and join the Asian teachers and just let it die. It's better than giving it over to people like them.
So when you ask me, just picture this. You have met me, felt the power I can deliver, heard the stories of how I developed it, the exercises that I developed that are mine. You know how I feel; the softness and power I convey in free movement.... then me having to listen to or watch their comedic antics as they steal my work and think they are any sort of representation....of me, when we all know how inept they really are.
Just imagine;
Them, in a room, with me?
____________________________________________________________
Cancer
Worse yet, has anyone noticed they all decided to do this in the year I have cancer. What does that tell you about their character? I don't even imagine they realize the optics of that.
"Hey, Dan has cancer. Let's take his stuff we barely understand and teach it. I don't think they are even capable of perceiving how it looks.
Why?
I think they lack the moral clarity, the integrity needed to be self aware enough to get that. Which is obvious; both in their sharing of any of MY material without permission and their lack of knowledge and ability.
I appreciate everyone giving me a heads up. But it might be better to tell them directly what you think of both them and their efforts. For me? Stress feeds cancer, they obviously, by deed, intent and action, wish me the worst. I can't give them the time.
As an Asian teacher once said when asked why he doesn't debate on forums? "Why argue...with students?"
As times goes by, more and more the wisdom of the Asian model keeps showing itself. I have to fight not to give in and close up shop.
Zoë words:
She continues to remind me: "Look at all the wonderful people we have met all over world and have to our home. Look in "their" eyes. They are quality people filled with integrity. You have built friendships and an international group. Don't let yourself get weighed down by these wanna-be's. They do not have your interest at heart. They are ego driven and into themselves.
Walk away from them. Focus on all the good. It is these people who are proving a case to NOT teach.
These men are proof.
11-03-23
Hi Everyone
There are those who know me here who will not understand contextually some of the comments and references I will mention because you don't know the background of that part of my life. That's okay. I am talking with many friends and students about the last couple of decades.
A trip down my path that made me so jaded:
I have to say that after 35 years of owning businesses, I was both burned out and extremely jaded. My trust in people... all but gone. When I transitioned to the internet and began reaching out and communicating to the martial arts community, what I encountered was an incredible display of ego, anger, protectionism and defense of supposed skills mostly due to rank and cooperative training. Those who knew me back then, know I was having, very narrow in scope and limited discussions of "internals within the martial arts" and their effectiveness on forums. What I got by way of response was: personal attacks, being thrown off forums, challenges, physical attacks, attempts at being sucker punched at seminars by high ranking (and some very famous) people (these were some of the occasions where I put some people in the hospital). Internals aside, I must say, I have found it particularly short sighted -even delusional- for Traditional Martial art teachers to ever imagine doing well against a grappler/boxer/weapons guy in his own wheelhouse. On the surface I found it expressed a serious lack of self-awareness.
So for me, the last twenty years has been a hell of a ride from being ostracized by the martial art community for: reciting historical fact, teaching models, terminology, and power expression they didn't know, could not show and had no power with. Thankfully, they showed up, I showed up and thousands of meet ups later and over 400 seminars, and them failing 100% of the time I went from having to defend, to now having fun and being a sought after teacher and me getting to explain without fighting and arguing anymore. Unfortunately for me, many in the Martial art community -them being who they are- are still ripping mad about it-to the point that we continually hear lies and stories made up out of thin air.
So Far:
*I have been "choked out" in rooms...that don't exist,
*By men... I've never met
*Been supposedly easily handled...... by menI have never met.
*Taught men a better way to throw me, allowed them to throw me, then...heard they magically threw me against my will.
*I have taught advanced level teachers, threw them across room in public, wrecked others in public, then had them cry in public over this knowledge I was teaching them (many times in front of their students) then watched as they later gave the credit to their Asian teachers!
*One teacher, who trained with me for years, came to my house every week he could, was throw over couches and chairs by me, told his own people and later in public in open rooms on an international stage (I introduced him to) that "I had the best aiki of anyone he had ever felt in or out of Japan!" Years later in a formal ceremony he hands me the Daito ryu Aiki-jujutsu 6th dan and Mokuroku. Then went on to write a book about his martial life like I was barely a footnote or didn't mention me or this training at all. All of this while I wasn't even advocating for me, but rather for the reality of this type of training in Daito ryu and how it could once again become a powerful art that didn't require cooperation. Unfortunately for him when everyone I introduced him to heard of this, all but two people walked away due to "stolen valor issues" Integrity matters to most people. Granted, not everyone in the martial arts, but rather most normal and reasonable people. Many of his own people contacted me to apologize for his behavior and ego. Some martial art people are just truly bizarre.
*Some other rumors that I heard were equally laughable and absurd, while others crossed the line and were dark and worthy of me suing for defamation were I so inclined.
*Not surprisingly the thousands of successful engagements over the years -all in open rooms- and in front of thousands of witnesses go unmentioned.
*Equally surprising was to read of a koryu menkyo gossiping about this or that. You would think that a Menkyo (who is a serious Japan-O-Phile type that is all into formality) would have some integrity and contact the source for verification? Nope., instead just gossips away. I would say he gossips like teenage schools girls...But that would be an insult to teenage school girls.
*Just imagine me spending decades of my life on research, decades of working on refinement, decades working to develop real skills, then developing a lexicon, a series of exercises, then encountering me all of the world and the results were always the same; them being stunned, and not having any understanding of what I was doing to them and no ability to do it themselves. and then wondering why they were never taught this in China or Japan. only to turn around and start stealing it without permission and without even the barest concern or credit for me and my people who developed this, and gave them an awakening -many times with tears in their eyes.
What's been safe for me is that everything I do is in open rooms-with many witnesses. As an aside from actual encounters, the real insiders might remember the truly vitriolic ramblings of some of the supposed "internal coaches" attacking me and flaunting their "three axis movement" and other models I have taught against in writing and in person for decades that they have now had to change in the face of their own arts master class teachers joining with my own voice of the cross body power and support. Comically, one of these people used to try and convince people I was steeling his material, only to discover I openly taught and advocated against his understanding-and that while not saying he was wrong, but rather that I knew that type of movement and you couldn't pay me to train my body and or move or respond that way, has interestingly enough changed his models to now...this late in the game, copy my own. The community has seen the early debates, the written arguments as they have been tracking us and they know it, see it and are cracking up over it. Fortunately for me it's all turned out very well for me-and not so good for them. Their having to change several things they thought were correct was predictable, I haven't had to change a thing. It stretched the incredible to the sublime and surreal to watch them accuse me, of what they have been caught doing.
What was also fortunate for me is that the unusual power coupled with someone who has the skill to use it in real time, and at speed in far more stressful environments than "traditional martial arts" appeared to be above the paygrade for the few daring to claim to have center or know internal strength and how to actually use it! This at least helped me to dispel some rumors that center and internals were useless and cement in place the reality of this material, its usability and everything else I had been saying on line for years, thus ending any doubt or argument of:
a. the history of internal training,
b. where and why it is now missing in the majority of people in pretty much every art,
c. It's practicality in use within the martial arts (when trained correctly) and last
d. It's great potential for use for modern combatives -provided you train them and learn how to fight.
So...getting to see more of its true potential has been an awakening for many people.
I said all of the above, to paint a picture of what I have encountered in the Martial art community for decades now: dishonesty, protectionism of both lineage and Asian teachers, rabid gossip lacking any interest in truth, and serious lack of skill in the higher level echelon of teachers.
My personal awakening
While that was profoundly un-fortunate for me, encountering all of this strange and rather whacky behavior from traditional martial art teachers and students -especially considering their distinct inability to actually deliver in person- made me close back up and *keep* my walls up. In short, I blew it. The odd and strange behavior of some, prevented me from seeing the vast majority of the many good people I was continually encountering. I did the proverbial "missing the forest for trees."
Years on the road
While I have made friends over these past years, I had to realize that for me; I still had my walls up and I was simply "servicing the contract" and not willing to truly let many folks in. I kept looking for the next betrayal, the next shoe to drop. Who could really blame me? But alas, I was not only wrong, I missed much of the great stuff that we were building; the comradery, the hope, the closeness, people reaching out to me that I was afraid to let in! And all this goodness? Well, it was all happening right before my own eyes.
Ever want to tell someone they are being a fool, only find out it was you?
Onward and upward:
Cancer
Who could have imagined that cancer would have a positive effect on me?
One of the many benefits of this past year was to receive so many emails and letters of support, prayers from hundred of people and financial aid to ensure I didn't have to work or drain savings. I cannot tell you how many times you all brought tears to both my and Zoe's eyes. I now realize that what I had only hoped for...we have actually done. Together we have built something that was never just about business or simply training; we were building bonds and friendships that have spanned the globe and that includes about every martial art you could think of. All training together, working together, laughing together, getting to know each other and our families. Not the least of which is realizing we do span the globe. We have people from shodan to Shihan to Menkyo. We come from Thirty Two countries, from all walks of life and professions, from Artists and tradespeople to 43 Doctors, Chiropractors, Physical therapists, to Attorneys, and judges to LEO;s and Special forces.
The future
While I don't know what the future holds for me, I am increasingly confident it will include remission, and ensure me of all the chances I am going to have. To live... and get to shake everyone's hand, hug everybody and personally thank you for reaching out to me, being patient in dealing with me, and for stepping out and taking a chance with me and falling in love with this work just like I have. I am hoping that together we can turn this ship around and bring back true effectiveness and power into these arts.
Sincerely
Dan
Hi Everyone
There are those who know me here who will not understand contextually some of the comments and references I will mention because you don't know the background of that part of my life. That's okay. I am talking with many friends and students about the last couple of decades.
A trip down my path that made me so jaded:
I have to say that after 35 years of owning businesses, I was both burned out and extremely jaded. My trust in people... all but gone. When I transitioned to the internet and began reaching out and communicating to the martial arts community, what I encountered was an incredible display of ego, anger, protectionism and defense of supposed skills mostly due to rank and cooperative training. Those who knew me back then, know I was having, very narrow in scope and limited discussions of "internals within the martial arts" and their effectiveness on forums. What I got by way of response was: personal attacks, being thrown off forums, challenges, physical attacks, attempts at being sucker punched at seminars by high ranking (and some very famous) people (these were some of the occasions where I put some people in the hospital). Internals aside, I must say, I have found it particularly short sighted -even delusional- for Traditional Martial art teachers to ever imagine doing well against a grappler/boxer/weapons guy in his own wheelhouse. On the surface I found it expressed a serious lack of self-awareness.
So for me, the last twenty years has been a hell of a ride from being ostracized by the martial art community for: reciting historical fact, teaching models, terminology, and power expression they didn't know, could not show and had no power with. Thankfully, they showed up, I showed up and thousands of meet ups later and over 400 seminars, and them failing 100% of the time I went from having to defend, to now having fun and being a sought after teacher and me getting to explain without fighting and arguing anymore. Unfortunately for me, many in the Martial art community -them being who they are- are still ripping mad about it-to the point that we continually hear lies and stories made up out of thin air.
So Far:
*I have been "choked out" in rooms...that don't exist,
*By men... I've never met
*Been supposedly easily handled...... by menI have never met.
*Taught men a better way to throw me, allowed them to throw me, then...heard they magically threw me against my will.
*I have taught advanced level teachers, threw them across room in public, wrecked others in public, then had them cry in public over this knowledge I was teaching them (many times in front of their students) then watched as they later gave the credit to their Asian teachers!
*One teacher, who trained with me for years, came to my house every week he could, was throw over couches and chairs by me, told his own people and later in public in open rooms on an international stage (I introduced him to) that "I had the best aiki of anyone he had ever felt in or out of Japan!" Years later in a formal ceremony he hands me the Daito ryu Aiki-jujutsu 6th dan and Mokuroku. Then went on to write a book about his martial life like I was barely a footnote or didn't mention me or this training at all. All of this while I wasn't even advocating for me, but rather for the reality of this type of training in Daito ryu and how it could once again become a powerful art that didn't require cooperation. Unfortunately for him when everyone I introduced him to heard of this, all but two people walked away due to "stolen valor issues" Integrity matters to most people. Granted, not everyone in the martial arts, but rather most normal and reasonable people. Many of his own people contacted me to apologize for his behavior and ego. Some martial art people are just truly bizarre.
*Some other rumors that I heard were equally laughable and absurd, while others crossed the line and were dark and worthy of me suing for defamation were I so inclined.
*Not surprisingly the thousands of successful engagements over the years -all in open rooms- and in front of thousands of witnesses go unmentioned.
*Equally surprising was to read of a koryu menkyo gossiping about this or that. You would think that a Menkyo (who is a serious Japan-O-Phile type that is all into formality) would have some integrity and contact the source for verification? Nope., instead just gossips away. I would say he gossips like teenage schools girls...But that would be an insult to teenage school girls.
*Just imagine me spending decades of my life on research, decades of working on refinement, decades working to develop real skills, then developing a lexicon, a series of exercises, then encountering me all of the world and the results were always the same; them being stunned, and not having any understanding of what I was doing to them and no ability to do it themselves. and then wondering why they were never taught this in China or Japan. only to turn around and start stealing it without permission and without even the barest concern or credit for me and my people who developed this, and gave them an awakening -many times with tears in their eyes.
What's been safe for me is that everything I do is in open rooms-with many witnesses. As an aside from actual encounters, the real insiders might remember the truly vitriolic ramblings of some of the supposed "internal coaches" attacking me and flaunting their "three axis movement" and other models I have taught against in writing and in person for decades that they have now had to change in the face of their own arts master class teachers joining with my own voice of the cross body power and support. Comically, one of these people used to try and convince people I was steeling his material, only to discover I openly taught and advocated against his understanding-and that while not saying he was wrong, but rather that I knew that type of movement and you couldn't pay me to train my body and or move or respond that way, has interestingly enough changed his models to now...this late in the game, copy my own. The community has seen the early debates, the written arguments as they have been tracking us and they know it, see it and are cracking up over it. Fortunately for me it's all turned out very well for me-and not so good for them. Their having to change several things they thought were correct was predictable, I haven't had to change a thing. It stretched the incredible to the sublime and surreal to watch them accuse me, of what they have been caught doing.
What was also fortunate for me is that the unusual power coupled with someone who has the skill to use it in real time, and at speed in far more stressful environments than "traditional martial arts" appeared to be above the paygrade for the few daring to claim to have center or know internal strength and how to actually use it! This at least helped me to dispel some rumors that center and internals were useless and cement in place the reality of this material, its usability and everything else I had been saying on line for years, thus ending any doubt or argument of:
a. the history of internal training,
b. where and why it is now missing in the majority of people in pretty much every art,
c. It's practicality in use within the martial arts (when trained correctly) and last
d. It's great potential for use for modern combatives -provided you train them and learn how to fight.
So...getting to see more of its true potential has been an awakening for many people.
I said all of the above, to paint a picture of what I have encountered in the Martial art community for decades now: dishonesty, protectionism of both lineage and Asian teachers, rabid gossip lacking any interest in truth, and serious lack of skill in the higher level echelon of teachers.
My personal awakening
While that was profoundly un-fortunate for me, encountering all of this strange and rather whacky behavior from traditional martial art teachers and students -especially considering their distinct inability to actually deliver in person- made me close back up and *keep* my walls up. In short, I blew it. The odd and strange behavior of some, prevented me from seeing the vast majority of the many good people I was continually encountering. I did the proverbial "missing the forest for trees."
Years on the road
While I have made friends over these past years, I had to realize that for me; I still had my walls up and I was simply "servicing the contract" and not willing to truly let many folks in. I kept looking for the next betrayal, the next shoe to drop. Who could really blame me? But alas, I was not only wrong, I missed much of the great stuff that we were building; the comradery, the hope, the closeness, people reaching out to me that I was afraid to let in! And all this goodness? Well, it was all happening right before my own eyes.
Ever want to tell someone they are being a fool, only find out it was you?
Onward and upward:
Cancer
Who could have imagined that cancer would have a positive effect on me?
One of the many benefits of this past year was to receive so many emails and letters of support, prayers from hundred of people and financial aid to ensure I didn't have to work or drain savings. I cannot tell you how many times you all brought tears to both my and Zoe's eyes. I now realize that what I had only hoped for...we have actually done. Together we have built something that was never just about business or simply training; we were building bonds and friendships that have spanned the globe and that includes about every martial art you could think of. All training together, working together, laughing together, getting to know each other and our families. Not the least of which is realizing we do span the globe. We have people from shodan to Shihan to Menkyo. We come from Thirty Two countries, from all walks of life and professions, from Artists and tradespeople to 43 Doctors, Chiropractors, Physical therapists, to Attorneys, and judges to LEO;s and Special forces.
The future
While I don't know what the future holds for me, I am increasingly confident it will include remission, and ensure me of all the chances I am going to have. To live... and get to shake everyone's hand, hug everybody and personally thank you for reaching out to me, being patient in dealing with me, and for stepping out and taking a chance with me and falling in love with this work just like I have. I am hoping that together we can turn this ship around and bring back true effectiveness and power into these arts.
Sincerely
Dan
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